This is not a food post, but I believe I have to write this to get it off my mind and also prepare you for the new direction Dooney’s Kitchen is taking. This is going to be quite long, so get ready. I had an interesting weekend to say the least. I got to see a snapshot of people’s real thoughts and reactions towards what I do. You know how you get told, don’t take people’s support for you as they truly mean it, because for many people they are only in to get what they can from you and will hail you to your face as long as you are giving them what they want. The minute you decide not to, you see their other side. That came through loud and clear these past few days. As suspicious as I mostly am of people’s intentions (because I am right 8 out of 10 times), I believe I have let my guard down and became slightly naive by assuming everyone wishes me well. People you expect so much more from, show their hands even for a brief moment. You don’t see it coming, so you get taken aback. One thing I did learn though was that, those who truly support you, will come out guns blazing in your defence. No mincing of words, no sitting on the fence. They want what’s best for you and don’t mind telling the world so, even if at the time it is not the popular view.
I have been told I over share, and people are using my recipes, my ideas in their businesses with me not getting rewarded for it. I never really got fazed by it because for me this is me, I love cooking, I love experimenting and feel happy and proud I am making a difference in people’s lives. Last week, the idea came to make Ogi into Ice cream with Coconut. Considering I made Ogi accidentally and the only reason I didn’t throw it away was because Lola Ashiru was championing the cause and I also thought to see if Ice Cream would work with Ogi. In my excitement, I shared it on SYTCC and the responses I got though good, the tone changed when I refused to share the recipe. Funny enough, I actually meant to, but was waiting to properly plate the ice cream, take pretty pictures etc. Gosh the unwell wishers truly came out of the woodwork, when the recipe was not forthcoming. Even after a friend truly came out on my behalf and said Dunni, don’t share this one, before you get told it is now being sold commercially, just like my Kilishi and Suya pizza is now being sold at Pizza stores in Lagos. The reaction I got was quite disturbing. Luckily, I am not one to cry but it did make me feel quite sad.
To now start seeing further comments that downright implied what I did isn’t a big deal, it can be figured out, you want to go through the trouble of keeping it a secret, lets see you try, you don’t have the manpower or resources, you can’t patent a food recipe, you have been open and sharing all the while, why stop now (I bet you half the people are not trying it for their personal use – here’s my cynicism coming forth). What will be will be, even if someone uses your idea commercially, it doesn’t mean you won’t be rewarded in another place. You can be hired to work for so so and so to develop recipes for them. No thank you ma’am, I don’t want to be anyone’s employee, you truly wish me well, you should say oh, I see you running your own business, providing stuff for people to buy and use, not box my dreams up, under some supermarket will employ me to do such and such. Really!!!! I am doing all this to catch the attention of a freaking supermarket and be their recipe developer. REALLY!!! If I was your sister, would you say such?
Some even went far ahead to pull out similar recipes just to show that if you won’t share, please go sit down. Hey people, here’s how she did it, this is something that has been done before, you can use this in place of Ogi. If I found such, out of respect for the person and in good faith, knowing I want her to succeed, I wouldn’t basically draw a red line to similar things because it will remove the “specialness” from the person’s work. But not everyone thinnks like me, for some people decency and being a true and kind person is not in their dictionary. If you look hard, such people will call themselves “Christians”. This is no attack on Christianity. To be honest, I never saw those links they put up, the idea to do this came from my Kenwood recipe manual. I didn’t even use all the ingredients or measurements stated in the manual. It was a lot of trial and error, totally on my own that created that Ice cream. And these are people I had initially thought were so supportive and would like to see Dooney’s Kitchen grow beyond a blog. They leave comments praising my work, I found out it was all “eye service”. As long as I am sharing, using my own money, my own time, my energy, my effort, if it just stays as a blog that continually feeds you what you want, you don’t care. Such selfishness is incredible to say the least. You basically pulled the rug from under my feet and thought nothing of it. This is how you know those that don’t really wish you well. We as a people, are not in the habit of forming a ladder around each other to lift each other up. We as Nigerians are not the type who help each other up to the top, forgetting that it is a collective effort, when Nigerian food gets to the heights I am aiming it for, it will benefit all of us, yet we complain about the state of affairs in the country. I have always noticed it, but as they say experience teaches you. Forgetting that if I didn’t share that it can be done, you wouldn’t have know where to go looking. That is the beauty of inventions. Nothing is new under the sun, but someone took the time and energy to try something from what already exists. I will never forget this, lessons learned.
Amidst the sadness though, many comments were coming which lifted my spirits and restored my faith. People who championed my cause and said, allow her to keep this one to herself, shouldn’t she be rewarded for all her work, she has given enough to earn the right to keep this a secret. Quite a handful of comments along those lines. To you guys, you know yourselves. I won’t mention your names, as much as I would love to personally honour you, but your support strengthened my resolve. I will never forget what you wrote, never. I have a very long memory and when the time comes for me to do something wonderful for you, I will not hold back.
It wouldn’t stop me from doing what I do, I will blog about food, I can’t stop now, but from henceforth, I will start keeping my test experiments to myself. I am a very cynical person and I let my guard down, good thing I did though because if this didn’t happen, I wouldn’t have gotten the message some people who truly wished me well were saying about me over sharing. I have dreams to turn what I do into a very profitable business, the first of its kind, but it is clear now that to do that, I have to be a little selfish and start thinking of myself. You have always been wowed by the directions I take food to, and if I don’t hold back now, when it is time to dip into your pockets and pay for something I produce, many will tell themselves, nah, we’ve seen all she can do, nothing special. I have to now cultivate the habit of an air of mystery. Like how you only get to see an excerpt of a book, the trailer of a movie, which prompts you to go buy the book or watch the movie. One phrase came out ringing very loudly in my ears after I read the comment. It went thus “from henceforth anything that can be commercially viable, no matter how excited you are about it, never ever let it out because you will get people screaming recipeeeeee”.
I also learnt something about competition and how it can bring out the meaness and nastiness from seemingly good people. To you I say, A flower does not think of competing to the flower next to it, it just blooms. There is room at the top for everybody. Bringing someone down doesn’t make a headway for you. The powers that be, don’t work like that. You may gain a little edge at first, but you will come crashing down so hard and fall flat on your face. You want to run down someone else’s hard work, take the shine off someone else, you will reap what you sow. I have the confidence to know that The Grace that has always been on my side will sort you out. I don’t even need to will it. It has always come to my support in the past, you don’t want to know where people who have done the same to me in the past are now, trust me. You want to step on me to advance yourself, I laugh, I truly laugh. I say bring it on, you will only be working towards your downfall.
And for the shameless copycats too, keep picking on my ideas, running off and doing it, that is all you will be known for. Lifting words off my blog, picking from me and adding to your own. I told my mum about it and she said errr, my dear, welcome to success. This is a mark of success. If no one is copying you, it means you are not doing things well. Those that are truly in the know, will know who is the original and who is the fake. Let them continue living in your shadow, that is where they will always be, while you press on to greater heights. So, to the shameless copycats, Oladunni Snr has spoken. Keep at it my dear, that will be what you are known for – Copying. I get notices from people, exposing your handiwork. I may not be able to do anything about it, but I know you will be dealt with from on High. As for chasing my shadow, get prepared dear, cos bigger things are coming, and chasing my shadow will become very exhausting for you. That I promise you. Believe me, you are NOT my competition, not even close. To be my competition, you would have to at least, be at the same level and it is obvious you are just a poor imitation. Word of advice, get some integrity for yourself, carve out your own identity and stop waiting for me to do something, while you run off like a rat that you are and go do something similar. You want to play with the big dogs, you better have your own bite. You can’t be as good as the person you are copying.
Sorry I had to unburden myself with this post. I felt it was necessary. This is a personal blog after all. Again, I salute those who really stood by my dreams. I pray The Lord will meet you at your point of needs and lift you up. You will attract people who will also lift you up. All our dreams will come true By His Grace. Looking forward to seeing you and interacting with you at the top. You will be part of the success of Dooney’s Kitchen. Amen.
Hmm … Am so sorry about this. I did not know things like this happen in foodies~dom.
I am with you on keeping your experimental recipes to yourself. Who really knows the recipe for Coke-Cola but we buy it.
Please just let me know when&/ where I can buy/order any of your product/cook book/treats etc.
Keep the good work.
I wish I could order your food but distance no go let me
Ah yes o Preye. Thank you for sharing in my vision and understanding too. Definitely, once products are on shelves for purchase, I will let you know
My dear, so sorry for the unfortunate incident. its the world we live in and its so pathetic. i can imagine the way you feel ‘cos my hubby has experienced this many times being a photographer and you see people using his pictures and not acknowledging him and some even go as far as cutting off his signature on the pictures, so i feel you. However i will say do not be discouraged, cos a photocopy will always be a photocopy no matter how good or sharp the photocopy machine is.
Remember, there is no 2 of YOU…. so when you launch out we know its you. Also because its your original idea, you can always modify, add and subtract to create something new. A stealer of ideas wont think of that.
So Dunni, relax and chill, your recipes are still your recipes. Won kan le gbiyanju ni.
Enjoy Grace dear.
Hmmmmn, dear Kemi, tell me about it o. This cyberspace that we deal in ehn, Nigerians just continue to show themselves. A photocopy will always be that. Thank you so much for the show of support. I appreciate it
You taught me how to get awesome pounded yam from my food processor. I’ve shared this with my two sisters and my mum. I actually dont want to tell anyone else, ridiculous as that sounds, that’s the way I feel about good tips, they should be kept to oneself. I think you are a food brainiac! And no matter what these people you worry about may say or even do, your excellence will shine through!
I always tell myself that I am a city set on a hill whose light cannot be hid. Its not me though, its the gift that God has put in me that makes me that way. Please always tell yourself that too. No matter how big/intimidating the internet is God pass am and you will still be the HEAD!
Just toughen up and shine Miss Dooney O!. Nothin do you!!!
Aaaaaaaaaw, thanks Funmi. Yes o, a city set on a hill whose light cannot be hid. Very powerful words. I will tell myself that, wow, something else to chant when next anyone wants to tear me down. He pass them o. Thank you so very much. I really really appreciate it, especially those powerful words. Thanks
I haven’t visited ur blog in a wile now, been a bit overwhelmed with work and other things. I actually saw the post on SYTYCC and my opinion has always been pls keep the recipe close to ur chest. I was amazed at some of the comments cos I am a firm believer that its by choice to choose to share a recipe or not to share and in the case of something like this, pls dnt share.
God will definitely bless the work of your hands. I have learnt a lot from u.
Thank you very much Estee for the support. It means a lot. Amen and Amen to your prayers
Dear Dunni, I just got to read this post today. I feel your pain. Let me say this to you: you are doing a great job and you are at the brink of living a dream, don’t let this distraction discourage you. As you have learnt, you will need to exercise wisdom and discretion when it comes to sharing your inventions no matter how excited you are about it.
As I read, I remembered a blog written by a fried of mine: “How to turn your hubby into a callin.” Here’s an excerpt:
“So many of us began this journey to dreamland as Technicians or people who loved something enough to want to do it on a daily or regular basis and money wasn’t the motivation. The challenge is over time, especially when you do it well and keep getting better at it; it is bound to consume more of your time and resources, and it is just wise to recognise that it is no longer a hobby but a calling.
In my view, a hobby transitions into a calling once the individual realises the value it brings to others, the satisfaction he gets, but also recognises that his gift is able to make room for him and create opportunities for others. Once we come to this realisation; we begin to consider how to monetize what we do; but then comes the challenge of self-consciousness; wondering what others will say now that you have a price tag attached to what you produce by your gift.
However, there has to come a day when you realise that if you want to continue to make the impact you are called to make, then you need to transition from hobby to calling.
The truth is those who used to get it for free know they should and can pay for what you give, but they will not say that to you because free pays them. Question is; does free pay you?
– See more at: http://www.bidemimarkmordi.com/how-to-transition-your-hobby-into-a-calling-podcast/#sthash.ViSOJsCy.dpuf
I look forward to seeing you living your dream. May The Lord make a way for you and enlarge your coast.
All I can say is Wow, Wow, Wow, Wow. That you took your time out to write this for me, makes the words you just put up here even more meaningful. I don’t know you but you have just touched something deep within me. Especially today where all i thought about while taking a shower was my cookbook. I hope to turn this blog into a service before the end of the year, I hope and trust that I will be able to count on you for patronage. I tell you, free doesn’t pay anymore. It defintely doesn’t and some days I don’t even have the zeal to cook anymore, but i know the journey to get where i want to won’t be easy and i have only been doing this for a little over a year. Amen and Amen, a resounding Amen to your prayers. I definitely will check that blog out. Thank you very much Irene.
Dear Dunni, you bet you can count on my patronage. I know something good when I see it. I also believe in encouraging people to relentlessly pursue their God-given calling. Your talent is a gift from God, it will even have a greater impact when you recognise that you can be a conduit of God’s blessing and advance the Kingdom’s agenda when you use it wisely. I hope you find time to visit that blog and benefit more from it as you decide on your next steps.
Cheering you on in your race towards living your dream. Looking forward to meeting you someday. In the interim, pls inbox or email me a postal address I can send a book to for you by the same Author. Or if you are likely to be in Nig during the month of July, I can get it to you there.
Blessings to you.
Thank you very much Irene for the support. I would be home much later in the year and I would very much like to meet you and collect it in person
Awwww Dooney, *sad face*. Am just reading this today and its only because i was on vacation. I come here every Friday to look for recipe to scatter my hubbys head during the weekend ;). People have said a lot and i wouldn’t want to repeat. I just want to recommend a book called “purpose redefined” by Sam Ore. You have a very special talent and it will take u places
Thank you Ire for the support. I will look out for that book
Ok Dooney, so this is it..This is the first time I am reading this post. This is the reason why I didn’t feel love from your response to me on my sharwama brouhaha. I even got scraed of asking you further question when I realized the pizza receipe was for fresh dough as I am saddled with already made pizza bread.
Now you see why some bad people will rub the good ones of some certain privilege. The world is a bitter place and I have also learnt that. I have also come to know that people that sabotage others and take their shine just cos they want to take their place, they don’t last and they always fall hard.
Your blog always put a smile on my face the way you present food. I have always watched food network but always scared to experiment on the foods there cos the ingredients don’t have Nigerian interpretation, but you broke that barrier for me; and for that am grateful.
All I say is that you gotta do what you gotta do to protect yourself, apologise to no one
I apologise if my reply was brief. I responded while I was busy with work, so i couldn’t go into much detail. With pizza base, the same principle of fresh dough will apply. lay over the tomato sauce, sprinkle over the toppings plus cheese and bake. I hope that helps. Thanks for the kind words of encouragement. I appreciate it
Thanks much
Dooney, I have seen most of your recipes at SYTYCC and i really admire your creativity in the kitchen though i have been very silent. As someone who is very creative in the kitchen and who aims at marking this creativity someday, I really understand how you feel. You see there are people out there whose only job is to steal ideas and market them as their own. Fact is this, they can only steal the finished product but cannot NEVER robe you of your brains (creativity). I just want to give you this story from the bible as a word of encouragement: Gen 26:12-24 tells us the story of how Isaac was blessed of the lord and his blessings became a cause of jeolousy and envy to the point that they stuffed up the wells he dug and asked him to move away from them because he had become too powerful for them. Let me just say something here really quick: All these jealous and envious people have issues with themselves not you! They know how powerful you have become and they cannot stand against that. Their envy says “I want what you have and i don’t want you to have it!” They wished they had your spot(light), (your gifts, your creativity) and pray you fade away so that they can lay claim on what you have developed. But their jeolousy and envy fail to realise that no matter how many times they ‘fill up your well’ no matter how many times they throw dirt at you, God is with you, He will increase your territory and you will flourish. He has a reason why He chose to grace you with the gifts you have and not THEM! So rest assured you have made the right decision because it was not until Isaac moved on, away from his haters and dug another well elsewhere that he had his breakthrough (v.22). It is well with you. Do not stop being who you are and God will certainly shower blessings on the work of your hands in Jesus Name.
Zita, Wow, wow, wow, wow. Thank you so much for blessing me this early morning. I read your comment with my mouth hung open. May The Lord Bless and enrich you for these words you typed today. Thank you so much
Hello Dunni, pls can I get ur contact details so we can talk better. A friend of mine gave me ur websites.
Hi Abiola. [email protected]